coming home

He was already dead when I got there, rushing to respond to a patient-in-decline call on a brand new patient we hadn't met yet.  Our nurse was on her way, but it would be awhile.  So we sat on the floor in the hall, next to Bert's body, right where he had fallen.  And in the shock and grief that comes with such an abrupt loss, Gloria talked about Bert.  High School tough guy. Vietnam vet.  Builder.  An addict.  Marriage problems.  How he'd been a good father and a really good grandfather.  She talked and cried and laughed.  And I found myself patting Bert's leg occasionally so he wouldn't feel like we had forgotten he was there on the floor between us.


Two days later Gloria called me and asked if I would speak at Bert's memorial service.  It would be casual, she said. After years of having nothing to do with church, Burt had been baptized a year ago.  He loved the story of the prodigal son.  "Can you just talk about that?" she asked.


Well, that was a first for me.  But then nothing about this experience had been "traditional".   


So I drove back up the gravel road to the small house with a large deck around it.  On one side of the deck was a barbeque pit, on the other side, big coolers of beer and 30 plus people with folding chairs looking for the right spot to sit.


Here are the basics of what I said:


I met Bert the day he died.  You all have known him for so many years.  I can't wait to hear what you are going to share about him in just a minute.  Here is what I know about Bert.  I know that he built this wonderful deck we are all sitting on.  I know he loved his family and friends.  Each of you here.  And I've been told that he loved the story of the prodigal son.  I do too.  I want to share a couple things I love about this story.  Maybe they're the same things Bert loved about it.


1.  I loved that it is a story for all of us.  Everyone of us can relate in someway to the prodigal son.  We all know what its like to make dumb decisions and to head for the far away country.  The Bible makes it clear that we all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.  We all know what it's like to wake up unhappy and say what am I doing with my life?  We all know that tug in hearts that pulls us home to the Father's house.  This story levels the playing field for each one of us.


2.  I love that the story makes it so clear that the whole time the boy is away, the Father is missing him.  Waiting and watching.  Longing for him.  "It is God's kindness that leads us to repentance."  Bert had so many ups and downs.  Times when he felt God's presence.  Times when he was angry.  Times when he felt lost.  God never lost sight of Bert.  God never gave up on Bert.  God never stopped loving Bert.


3.  I love the part where the boy comes home.  Dirty, smelly, ashamed, with a long speech - I am not worthy to be called your son.... "But the father wasn't listening.  The father was running to meet him.  The father was hugging and kissing him.  The father was showering him with gifts and yelling to his friends "My boy is home!"   What better picture of God do you need?  That is a God we can all trust Bert too.  We can all rest knowing Bert is in that God's hands.


I prayed.  Then everyone got a chance to share.  We filled the late afternoon with sounds of friends and family reminiscing, sharing, laughing and crying together.  About Bert's famous Chicken Pot Pie, the disasterous pool Bert built for his grandchildren, how people called him The Discovery Channel because he had an opinion about everything.  It went on for over an hour, before the grill got fired up and bottle tops began popping.  Another journey's end party for another beloved prodigal.